homeroomlessons

Sunday’s Sermon – Put Your Best Foot Forward – Ephesians 6:10-20

August 26, 2018 Leave a Comment

What do you, or did you, need to start the school year off right? A special new lunchbox? A fresh box of crayons? Those yellow number 2 pencils? Chances are, in addition to your own favorites, you were checking off a school supply list from a teacher. Some are even quite detailed, down to the color of the folders with or without brads in the middle. The purpose of these lists, I think, among other things, is to help get students prepared with everything they might need for the coming year. And even if we are not in class anymore, some of us love to walk those aisles with a sense of nostalgia, or the joy of that new box of crayons for ourselves.

Even as adults we often make sure we have the supplies we need before we begin a project. It’s a good plan to do this before attempting to assemble a piece of furniture, for example. For other projects, failing to do so means at least 5 trips to Home Depot to get the right tools or items needed for your fix. I’m keenly aware of this as a natural instinct right now, as we’re about 5 weeks or so from my due date, and that “nesting” desire is setting in, prompting us to prep the nursery, clean the house, and make plans for the arrival of our second child. The point in all of these instances is to get ready with everything you’ll need to make the process as smooth as it can be. It’s living out the Boy Scout motto, “be prepared,” and anticipating what might be needed along the way.

The verses we have read this month from the letter to the Ephesians have all revolved around this kind of preparation for the early Christians – both the eager anticipation of Christ’s return and trying to figure out how to navigate life as believers in the context of a challenging world. Historians believe that:

the community of Christians, called “Ephesians” may have lived somewhere in Asia Minor during the first two centuries CE. They were religious minorities in the Roman Empire. Christianity was illegal until 313[i].

In this context, we are reminded of the persecution and struggle the early church had in relation to living in the Roman Empire. This is the root of the idea of “spiritual warfare,” where people of faith were up against a lot, and trying to make sense of a new way of belief in and amongst significant influences that often pushed against the cores of following Jesus. One commentary notes:

If they were in fact in Ephesus, they may have been taken to worship the emperor at the newly constructed temple of Domitian to test their allegiance. Ephesus was also a thriving commercial city and the cultic center of goddess Artemis[ii]

Recognizing that these Christians would be up against a lot, to the point where it would feel like a significant battle, the writer leaves them with a “supply list” for living the Christian life to help them survive the struggles they might face both externally and internally.

The imagery may seem strange to us, even off-putting. It certainly is militaristic and heavy with images of battle that most of us don’t encounter every day. In this, remembering the context is particularly important. For what the writer gives is not a list of advanced weaponry, but rather a significant list of defensive and protective items, meant to withstand, not necessarily conquer. This is particularly important when we consider the ways in which Christians have utilized such battle metaphors to justify holy wars and conflicts in the following centuries, the Crusades being a notable example, but not the only one. The purpose of this “equipment list” was not to create some sort of “army” for God, but rather to help Christ followers to “put their best foot forward” into living the life to which we have been called (see Ephesians 4).

This morning, I want to borrow from my colleague Rev. Sara Nave Fisher, and suggest a modernized look at these items as a way of understanding how they might continue to be our “discipleship supply list” for Christian living today[iii]:

First – the belt of truth we might consider as an identification badge or credentials.

the “belt” of Roman armor wasn’t just a way to keep pants in place – it was more like a badge, it was how they showed rank – their experiences, who they wereⁱⁱⁱ.

Perhaps we show our rank visually with some sort of symbol of our faith. Like a fish or bumper sticker on the back of our car, or a cross necklace. In this, we proclaim our allegiance first to God, rather than anything else that would otherwise claim us. The belt is placed at the center of our being. This represents what we stand for that holds it all together at our very core.

The breastplate of righteousness is similar. It is where we show our true colors. It’s more than just whether we are wearing red and black or white and gold to identify with our team. It’s about carrying ourselves in a way that when people see us, they see reflections of God. Both become almost a uniform that helps us proclaim not just who we are, but who God is.

Next, the shoes on our feet. The verse here isn’t so specific about what kind of footwear, but rather reminds us of the purpose of it – whatever will make us ready to proclaim the gospel of peace. For some of us, that’s sneakers so we’re ready to go. For others, it’s orthopedic shoes that we might not be slowed down by any ailment. Maybe for you it’s leopard print high heels that command attention and give a sense of power and fun to your message. For some it’s boots – cowboy, combat, or steel-toe – meant for hard work and heavy liftingⁱⁱⁱ. It could even be flip-flops, representing a laid-back attitude that creates a sense of comfort and ease in conversation. Whatever it is for you, the writer tells you to put your shoes on so that you’ll be ready to go when the time comes. It’s about being prepared, after all. Our shoes can help give us the traction to make it through even challenging and uneven terrain, digging in as needed with cleats or tread, or perhaps gliding across a smooth dance floor for conversations that require more gentleness. It’s not about stomping around; it’s about taking the right steps.

Fourth, the shield of faith. This one is clearly meant to deflect and defend, perhaps offering some sort of barrier or buffer between you and the challenges of the day. The shield can help take the brunt of the blow, or offer additional time to reflect before responding.

Perhaps a modern equivalent might be a “backpack of faith” or some sort of toolkit that holds additional supplies to strengthen us in our faith. Because people will disagree with us – they may loudly disagreeⁱⁱⁱ.

That’s a natural consequence of proclaiming peace with those special shoes, and sometimes we need something else to pull from to make it through.

Next, the helmet of salvation, that thing we need to keep on the top of our minds. Or, put another way, the “sunglasses of salvation,” the lens through which we see the world.

Above all else, we have salvation. Even when our shields fail, even when our breastplate is infiltrated, we have salvation. No matter what, we have a God who saves us. Because at the end of the day it isn’t about us or what we do about who we are – the good news of the Gospel is about who God isⁱⁱⁱ.

The helmet of salvation reminds us of the connection that should exist between our head and the core of our being – that belt of truth, and guides our thoughts and actions to become extensions of that understanding above all else. It also means seeing the world through the eyes of a God who saves; this means extending grace and forgiveness to each other, just as we have been forgiven in Christ.

Finally, the writer gives one item – the sword of the Spirit. Fortunately, this one comes with a bit more explanation – he’s talking about the Word of God, which has the power to transform and change and cut through even the most difficult circumstances with good news. Let’s liken this to a collection of sharpened pencils. A lot of school supply lists nowadays have not just pencils on the list, but specifically indicate that they are to be sharpened, and for good reason. First, quite simply, an unsharpened pencil is not tremendously useful for writing. It needs to be shaped and worked before it’s usable. Good teachers and administrators have learned to do this in advance. In the middle of a test is not the time you want a room full of students having to sharpen their pencils. It’s loud, noisy, and distracting, and it takes time away for the work you should be doing. Having the pencils sharpened already makes you ready to jump right in for the task at hand, whether it’s taking notes or taking a test.

Using the sharpened pencils of the word of God means that we know the Bible so well, we have spent time studying and understanding, and we can have conversations about itⁱⁱⁱ.

Note, this doesn’t mean we are supposed to use the Bible as a weapon. In the movie Saved, the lead character literally throws her Bible at a classmate trying to get her to change what the character believes is wayward living. That’s not the intention of God’s Word. Rather, it is meant to shape us and guide us. So, having sharpened pencils of this word is about recognizing the power inherent in the Spirit’s movement as we read and study the Bible together, and knowing it has the power to change even us:

It’s knowing that God’s word cuts through evil, not through each other. It cuts through racism and through classism and division of all kinds – again, not through each otherⁱⁱⁱ.

It’s trusting that, in the end, as the Psalmist proclaims, the Word of the Lord will endure forever, even as everything else fades away. In this way, it can become like a permanent marker I suppose, but the pencil reminds us of how the Spirit is continually moving and providing shading and different levels of understanding, allowing us even to erase some of our preconceived notions and correct our own answers about faith.

What a list, right? With these items in our cart, we should have everything we need to lead lives of faithfulness to Christ. And we might be tempted to rush out and seek to check them all off the list. Here’s the hitch, though. They aren’t necessarily easy to find. We won’t be able to make a quick run through Target’s school supply aisle and grab them all, and that’s not just because those aisles in stores are quickly being replaced with Halloween costumes and Christmas decorations. It’s because this list from Ephesians:

Isn’t an external list that we have to go shop for. It’s one that has already been given to us by Godⁱⁱⁱ.

That reminder comes to us again and again in Ephesians, ringing out like a well-known chorus. It is God who fills us with the resources we need to go about this discipleship business, through the gifts of grace that come alongside the good news of Jesus Christ. Ephesians offers the reminder that it’s been within us all along, and urges believers to dig deeper into themselves to discover it, and then use it.

Our bags are already packed! God has made us ready to go! We just have to remember to take it with us when we go out the door. May we be prepared in the best way we can, putting on all God has already given us, so that each day we can “put our best foot forward” and walk into the journey of faith and life before us. Amen.

~Rev. Elizabeth Lovell Milford
August 26, 2018

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[i] Haruko Nawata Ward, “Theological Perspective: Ephesians 6:10-20,” Feasting on the Word: Year B, Volume 3, David L. Bartlett and Barbara Brown Taylor, editors, (Louisville, KY: Westminster John Knox Press, 2009).
[ii] Ibid.
[iii] Many of these parallels from Rev. Sara Nave Fisher, “Armor,” sermon delivered August 19, 2018. Shared with Rev. Elizabeth Milford on August 22, 2018.

Sunday’s Sermon – Homeroom Lessons: Use Time Wisely – Ephesians 5:15-20

August 19, 2018 Leave a Comment

Five hundred twenty-five thousand six hundred minutes
Five hundred twenty-five thousand moments so dear
Five hundred twenty-five thousand six hundred minutes
How do you measure, measure a year?

In daylights, in sunsets
In midnights, in cups of coffee
In inches, in miles
In laughter, in strife

In five hundred twenty-five thousand six hundred minutes
How do you measure a year in the life[i]

This song opens the second act of the popular musical Rent, as characters reflect on what has been and what is to come, wondering what to make of it all. The answer supplied by the chorus? “Measure in love.”

Time is one of the most fascinating concepts of our lives. While we have made it into an objective fact, marked by ticking clocks and the turning of calendar pages, it also can be a quite subjective or even relative thing. Some things seem to take forever, while others pass in the blink of an eye. In school, I remember teachers giving us assignments to complete in certain amounts of time and reminding us to “use time wisely!” – in other words, we needed to get down to work to make sure the task was complete. It’s a valuable life skill to be sure. Our lives are governed by our sense of time in a lot of ways, which means that we spend a fair amount of energy on time management. In fact, it can make the difference in whether we are on time for an appointment, or sitting on 75 stuck in traffic because we have, yet again, grossly misestimated how long it will take us to get downtown.

This morning, though, I’d like to consider this gift of time as a bit more than just how we accomplish our busy schedules. Time, you see, is also a theological concept. In Greek, this is reflected by the use of two different words to recognize time. The first, chronos, as in the root of our word chronological, talks about sequential and ordered time. The second, kairos, is the one we find in our text today from Ephesians, which gets at something bigger. Namely, it calls us to consider time as the right, critical, or opportune moment, particularly in relation to God’s timing and purpose.

In this section of moral instructions in chapter 5, the author speaks to this understanding of time, urging the Ephesians to be wise and make the most of the time they have been given. One more language note: the Greek verb that appears alongside time in verse 16 translates literally as “buy back” or “redeem,” which stands in contrast to the verses it follows that include warnings about not getting caught up in the pagan ways that surround them. Instead, the writer argues, Christians should remain awake and alert. In other words, we have been given the gift of “time” from God, but it’s up to us to make it into something worthwhile, moving from chronos to kairos.

So – what does this look like? This week I came across a video by an inspirational speaker named Jay Shetty. He grew up in London, England and holds a degree with honors in Behavioral Science. Inspired to make a difference in the world, he spent 3 years after graduation living as a monk across India and Europe, spending time in meditation and service to others. After this, he returned to London and eventually was invited by a business school friend to speak to those undergoing intense stress in the workplace, which has led over the past two years into a remarkable social media presence among other speaking engagements. I want to share a three-minute clip of one of his videos, which speaks to the idea of time and how we might value it, and offer you the opportunity to consider your own relationship with time.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vPaS85IA6oY

[ii]

How do we value time? That is at the heart of today’s text from Ephesians. In many ways, Jay Shetty modernizes the concept in this video, but in ways that reflect the Epistle’s intentions. Both prompt us, perhaps in uneasy ways, to think about the ways we allocate the minutes or seconds we are given each day. I’ll be the first to admit that more time than I would like is what I could categorize as “wasted time.” You know, the things that start as a short break, and the next thing you know, you’ve “lost” 30 minutes or more on some frivolous activity? It doesn’t always have to be watching tv or scrolling Facebook, either. Sometimes we get distracted by things that are otherwise productive; like when you go to put something away and end up reorganizing the entire closet, leaving your original tasks incomplete. I’m not sure exactly what the challenges were for first-century Christians, but I imagine they must have had their own examples, much like we do today. It’s easy to lose a sense of intention about our time, or to have the best intentions and lose track of it.

These verses help remind us of the ways in which our lives as Christians call us to mark and observe time in different ways. It’s not unlike the most basic instructions God gave to Moses and the people of Israel in the 10 Commandments to work for 6 days and then set aside one to rest – sabbath. It seems the Almighty has always been concerned with how we shape our time. And here in Ephesians 5, we get a reminder of it, with the call to participate in worship. As G. Porter Taylor notes:

Worship of God redeems the time. It orients the person to the Almighty and keeps his or her life in right relation [iii].

Worship here, of course, is not about a chronos understanding of one hour on a Sunday morning. It’s about a kairos understanding of time, as we seek to fill our lives with an awareness of the holy, so that we might be filled by the Spirit to the point where not just our voices sing, but our entire hearts take part in the melody. When we live in this way, we are truly embracing our vocational calling from God, which of course has implications for how we spend our time, and our lives become marked not by seconds, minutes, hours, days, or years, but by a sense of God’s ongoing purpose in our own lives and the world, and our active participation in it.

Sometimes, though, it can take some work to figure out what this means. It involves investing our time in reflection and worship to listen for that call. Consider this: worship – that time spent here in the Sanctuary, or engaged in Bible Study or service, or your own personal prayer life or other spiritual disciplines – is a lot like going to the gym. You can go and clock in a certain amount of time, but the actual time spent in the location is not what guarantees you the results; it is going to involve what you put into it. If all of your time “working out” is spent looking in the mirror, or perfecting the playlist, or making sure your outfit is the most-trendy, you might not get in the best shape. But if you pay attention to your form, push yourself to new limits, and maybe even check-in with a personal trainer or work-out buddy, chances are you will start to see some improvement. And then, beyond the time in the gym, comes the importance of rest days in between, a healthy diet, and even some cross-training that might happen in other locations. All of these, together, contribute to a healthier lifestyle marked by wise uses of your time in order for you to be at your best self. Our spiritual lives are not that different. They take intention and work. What better way than to start with how we approach something as simple and basic as time?

The early monastic communities and many people of faith for centuries have done this by “keeping the divine office,” that is pausing at certain times of day for regular intervals of prayer. This “Liturgy of the Hours” provides an ongoing reminder that we are to be oriented in a spirit of worship, seeking to move through our days not just with accomplishing a to-do list, but with a sense of our time, and our lives, being holy. Give it a try this week, whether it’s setting an alarm every few hours, or just one at a certain point in your day, to pause and reflect prayerfully on God’s presence in your life and your sense of what it means to live as a disciple. Such a simple practice can truly change how you see your life and the world around you. All it takes is a few moments of well-spent time.

And that is what the writer of Ephesians was hoping those Christ-followers would do – see the world through a different lens, a worshipful one, that just might help them make the most of the time they had been given by God until Christ returned. In the end, these verses echo our teachers’ instructions for any task at hand, broadened to the task of living: Use Time Wisely! May it be so.

~Rev. Elizabeth Lovell Milford
August 19, 2018

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[i] Jonathan Larson, “Seasons of Love” from the musical Rent. Universal Music Publishing Group.
[ii] Jay Shetty, “Before you Waste Time” Video, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vPaS85IA6oY, accessed 8/16/18.
[iii] G. Porter Taylor, “Theological Perspective: Ephesians 5:15-20,” Feasting on the Word: Year B, Volume 3, David L. Bartlett and Barbara Brown Taylor, editors, (Louisville, KY: Westminster John Knox Press, 2009).

Sunday’s Sermon – Homeroom Lessons: Watch Your Words – Ephesians 4:25-5:2

August 12, 2018 Leave a Comment

“Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words can never hurt me!”

Do you remember learning this rhyme on the playground, perhaps being taught it as a response to name-calling? It’s an old rhyme, with one of the earliest citations of it found in a March of 1862 issue of The Christian Recorder, a periodical published by the African Methodist Episcopal (AME) Church. The article insisted that:

true courage consists in doing what is right despite the jeers and sneers of our companions[i].

It referenced the popular rhyme as an old adage, one that had been around for a while and had stood the test of time, likely due to its sage wisdom as well as recurring need to hear it. For as much as we nod along and repeat it, we know it to be a truth that pushes against our reality; namely, words can hurt – deeply. And this is true whether they are intended as weapons, spoken without much thought at all, or even voiced in honesty.

Our text for this morning from the letter to the Ephesians zeroes in on the importance of words and speech we use within the Christian community. The premise is relatively simple and straightforward; we are to speak truthfully to one another. Authenticity in speech is what binds the community together. Without it, we will certainly fail. But with it comes a risk, which quickly follows in verse 26. The truth is sometimes going to be messy. It gets intertwined with anger and bickering, gossip and bitterness, and all sorts of other things. Sound about right? The classic example of this, of course is that no-win question “does this dress make me look fat?” But more than just the need for carefully worded answers, words matter to us because alongside the belief that we are to be honest with each other, we are conditioned with being “nice” – almost to a fault. At times, the two seem at odds. In the South, we couch this by adding phrases like “bless her heart.”

In her book, Waking Up White, Debby Irving identifies this as one of the reasons having conversations about race is so difficult. She reflects on the ways in which her upbringing in New England taught her to sweep things under the rug and avoid many topics, particularly racial or controversial ones, because they were things “we just don’t talk about.” Avoidance becomes a marker of success. And somewhere in the midst of that, the ability to speak truth at times gets pushed to the back, because it would most certainly result in feelings of judgment or anger. Irving notes that:

The culture of niceness provides a tidy cover, creating a social norm that says conflict is bad, discomfort should be avoided, and those who create them mark themselves as people who lack the kind of emotional restraint necessary to hold positions of power. Another vicious cycle[ii].

This means that important conversations got ignored, and those without power are silenced. It’s one manifestation of injustice, and it moves us farther away from the instructions to the Ephesians.

So how do we get out of such a cycle, and into the framework where we instead “speak the truth”? In 1992, MTV debuted a show with the following tagline:
Seven strangers picked to live in a house . . . and have their lives taped . . . to find out what happens . . . when people stop being polite . . . and start getting real.

The Real World ran for 32 seasons (!), and essentially was a study in what it meant to be in community together. These strangers, as they got to know each other and built relationships, soon realized that they didn’t all agree on, well, practically anything sometimes. And yet, they were forced together in this microcosm environment where they had to figure it out. Drama and conflict made for compelling television and somewhat manipulated storylines. To be sure, it was often pretty ugly.

I think, though, there’s room for a bit of a parallel with the church and this passage from Ephesians. We have been picked to live in this “house,” the church – called by Christ (remember, the first three chapters of Ephesians captures this gift of grace in a nutshell), and now are called to make something of it. Eventually, the “nice” is going to wear out. No doubt the early church felt that, with mounting pressures and persecutions. And the writer of Ephesians, likely a contemporary or student of Paul’s, is writing about what happens when things start to get real.

Now, hear me out on this – I don’t think it’s a bad thing to want to be respectful and polite. Watching our words absolutely means paying attention to how we phrase things to one another, including an awareness that not all words or terms are appropriate. This is critical if we want to advance conversation and truly get to the heart of what matters to us. But sometimes, we get lazy about our words and simply choose to stay quiet, which can get in the way of our truth telling, and serves simply to avoid conflict. And when we do that, I think we fall short of the kind of community that Ephesians references, because we miss the opportunity to address the truths that we are called as children of God, to speak to our neighbors. Debby Irving continues:

Ignoring feelings and trying to smooth them over with pleasant chitchat only promises to hold people back from allowing their hearts to join their minds in recognizing injustice when it’s right in front of them, or even inside them[iii].

When we start to bottle these things up, they can lead to resentments between us and tension in our relationships. This happens between friends and spouses, within groups and communities, and even on a bigger scale in our society. In fact, I would offer that it’s been happening for quite some time now in our country. It is an understatement to say we live in divisive times, where tensions are high. Words are cutting like swords. Name-calling is rampant. In fact, sometimes that’s as far as it gets before things escalate. Instead of speaking truth to one another, many are simply content to throw out labels and slogans that separate us from our neighbors, even when we know those stereotypes are a lie. Because they are, right? That’s the entire nature of stereotypes – they’re oversimplified images or ideas about a person or thing; the do not tell the whole story, the whole truth about any individual. Consider that for a moment. Words like “conservative” or “Republican” or “liberal” or “Democrat” do not define any one person or even one group. Why, then, are we letting those take such a hold on us? What would it look like for us, as the church, to speak the truth to our neighbors about these divisions? Or even to speak the truth to ourselves about them and the ways in which they are coloring how we see one another? We might just stumble back into Ephesians, with the reminder that “we are members of one another” (verse 25). As such, we are called to do more than throw out labels in anger. That makes room for evil to work. Instead, we are called to a different way of being.

Ephesians acknowledges that speaking the truth will lead to anger and conflict, but it does not leave us there. Instead, it gives us some practical advice for how to make it through it. Verse 29 tells us “let no evil talk come out of your mouths, but only what is useful for building up, as there is need, so that your words may give grace to those who hear.” At first, this might remind us of the advice from the classic Disney movie, Bambi, where the rabbit Thumper recounts advice from his mother, “If you can’t say something nice, don’t say nothing at all.” But considering this in the context of a passage about speaking the truth, we can’t be satisfied with mere silence and avoidance; that’s how we end up in the “culture of niceness,” that gets us nowhere. Instead, we might take a step back, and consider that our words matter, and find a way to offer constructive criticism to one another in love.

One of my seminary courses was on group dynamics, and my professor, much to our chagrin, harped on a concept known as “The Awareness Wheel,” forcing us to use its cycle with almost every comment we made in class. It is especially helpful in conflict, because it focuses on sensory data and “I” statements that remain focused on the core issue. It goes something like this:

State your observation “I sense” -or “When I see/hear”

Reflect on your thoughts, “I think . . .”

Name your feelings, “and I feel. . .”, identifying the core emotion at play.

Identify what you want to happen, “I want,” and finally

Make a commitment to what you might do to achieve that purpose, “I will. . .”

Truthfully, most of us absolutely hated the Awareness Wheel. It even became a running joke to work into lunchroom conversations. Equally as truthful? It’s totally helpful in conversation particularly when things are tense. It’s a tool I use with couples preparing for marriage and groups in conflict. And when I’m at my best communicating, I employ it in my own life. It’s also helpful in navigating toddler tantrums when you need to keep your sanity. But most of all, I think it points to the kind of grace-filled speech that Ephesians is getting at. This passage reminds us that it’s not about avoiding the tough conversations; it’s about engaging in them faithfully and well, so that we are working towards reconciliation and building each other up.

In school, we might have been told to “watch your words.” This is more than just a reminder not to curse or say hate-filled theme. It’s a call to speak with intention. To put aside the things that are laced with anger and bitterness and spitefulness and instead seek kindness, which I would argue is distinct from the niceness we talked about earlier. As one friend put it, “kindness is telling a friend, or even stranger, who is leaving the restroom that her dress is tucked into her underwear; niceness is not saying anything because you don’t want to embarrass her.”

Kindness is not ignoring the difficulty of conflict and disagreement; kindness is being willing to work through it together. That leads us to an openness to forgiveness, made possible not because we possess superhero type powers of forgetfulness, but because we live in an awareness of the gift of grace that comes in remembering that God has forgiven us through Jesus Christ. This is what gives us the confidence and competence to attempt to forgive each other, and is what can become the work of reconciliation. God who has made us members of one another in Christ, seeks that we follow in his footsteps, that we might become imitators of our Savior himself, and live in the love he first showed to us. It always starts and ends with God. In between are the words we say to one another. May we be attentive to them, take on the bold task of truth-telling and hard conversations with each other, and find ourselves living in love as Christ’s community is built up even now. Amen.

~Rev. Elizabeth Lovell Milford
August 12, 2018

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[i] https://www.phrases.org.uk/meanings/sticks-and-stones-may-break-my-bones.html
[ii] Debby Irving, Waking Up White and Finding Myself in the Story of Race, (Cambridge, MA: Elephant Room Press, 2014).
[iii] Debby Irving

Sunday’s Sermon – Homeroom Lessons: Make Good Choices – Ephesians 4:1-16

August 5, 2018 Leave a Comment

A fun and engaging way to get to know others, whether in a large group or passing time on a long road trip, is to ask each other a series of questions beginning with the phrase “Would you rather?,” giving two choices and inviting the responder to share why they picked one over the other. Let’s try it for a few rounds. I’ll let you point to the designated side of the sanctuary, and make a short comment to your pew-mate after each pairing. Ready?

Would you rather . . . go on vacation to the mountains or the beach?

Would you rather . . . be completely invisible for one day, or be able to fly for one day?

Would you rather . . . give up watching tv or movies or give up going out to eat for a year?

Would you rather . . . always be 10 minutes late, or always be 20 minutes early?

Would you rather . . . know all the mysteries of the universe or know every outcome of each decision you make? [i]

Every day, we are faced with an almost endless number of choices to make. What to wear, what to do, how to respond to any given situation. Our choices might be easy and quick, or require more information or deliberation. Some of these choices give us more options than others. Sometimes we are choosing between two things and neither of them is particularly appealing. And, of course, different choices carry different levels of meaning or importance in our lives. That is sometimes, but not always, reflected in the time we take to make them. I might, for example, only take a few moments to select which shoes to wear, but take longer to decide that I want to spend the rest of my life married to another person. Ultimately, what we choose can say a lot about us, whether it is simply a preference for an activity or lifestyle, or a reflection of a deeply-seated belief.

This morning, our text from Ephesians prompts us to reflect on the choices we make as we think about how we are “living our lives,” and whether or not they are in line with the “calling” we have as God’s people. This letter is often believed to be a kind of circular letter written by an associate or student of Paul’s, and includes exposition on the centrality of Christ, including a grand vision of what God has done and what is given to and through the church. Then, in this passage, the writer turns from the big picture to answering the “so what?” question of how this new reality might play out in the everyday life of the church, with discussion of the unity of the church and the ongoing sanctification of believers. That is, the ways in which our lives reflect God’s holiness. Ephesians, like many of the epistles, takes on a moral character and instruction for life. Not because it is what wins us God’s favor, that much is made clear in earlier verses, but because it matters how we respond to God’s grace. In essence, much of the letter, including these verses, shout that message we may have heard from a parent as we climbed onto the schoolbus or got out of the drop-off line, or shared by a homeroom teacher as we began our day: “Make Good Choices!” Our lives as Christians should be those that reflect the good news we believe. The large theological catchphrase for this is “embodiment” – which simply means that the beliefs we hold and witness we give can and should be reflected in our words and actions. The smaller acronymn that fits on a bracelet is something like WWJD – What Would Jesus Do? – implying that before we say or do something, we’ve put some thought into whether or not it is in line with the teachings of the one we claim to follow. It’s tough work, even for the most faithful, who seem to clearly be called for God’s purpose.

Ask David. His story is one marked from the beginning as being chosen by God, shepherded in unlikely ways to become king. But by 2 Samuel, the story takes a turn. To say David does not make good choices is a vast understatement. Chapter 11, just before what we read this morning, reveals more than just a series of bad choices. It is a devastating story of as repugnant a series of events as perhaps may be imagined, from his rooftop voyeurism and sexual exploitation of Bathsheba to his deception and attempts to cover it up by manipulating her husband Uriah to his savage final resolution of not only arranging for Uriah’s death, but the death of all who serve under his command. His actions are reprehensible and beyond excuse. They are difficult to stomach, and almost impossible to preach, because as tempting as it is to skip ahead to the ways in which the narrative redeems David, these verses are atrocious. So why attend to these chapters today, or in the 3 year cycle of the lectionary at all? One commentator notes:

This lection is one of the greatest passages in the entire Bible, for it not only makes a devastating statement about the moral priorities of God, but it also abandons sentimentality and romanticism to portray the human condition as it actually is[ii].

God’s response to David, if you keep reading into chapter 12, is to hold David accountable for these decisions, sending the prophet Nathan to condemn him and call him out for the choices he has made, prompting a confession and cleansing. In fact, it is believed that Psalm 51, which we often read on Ash Wednesday and which inspired our Prayer of Confession today, was David’s repentance and plea to God following his visit with Nathan. And it should be noted, since we will not continue to read this part of the text in the coming weeks, that while David goes on in continued service to God, his life is not all magically rosy. It is still fraught with pain and difficulty, related in part to his poor decisions. From this overall context, we learn that in the midst of grace and forgiveness, David’s choices still have real consequences. Life is lived in between these two truths.

The prophet Nathan exposes that David’s behavior is driven by self-interest and impulse, rather than a focus on God. He did not engage in some sort of discernment for how his faith and trust in God might guide him; he simply did what looked and felt good for his own gain. Such decision making methodology is often short-lived, and certainly falls short of the calling God has placed on God’s people. David’s story reminds us that “making good choices” is about much more than just selecting things that make us the happiest. They involve an attentiveness to something bigger than us. That is what the writer of Ephesians is getting at, too. As a people of faith:

We confess that there is a purpose other than our own that is being worked through our life. Our growth is to become more responsive and attentive to, and congenial with, that larger purpose on which we do not get to vote[iii].

This larger purpose connects us to others. David missed this mark, to say the least. To frame it in light of of Ephesians:

he is not “worthy,” because he did not yield his gifts to his community. He refused to live by God’s gifts, trying to seize a peculiar destiny for himself[iv].

It is no coincidence that the writer of Ephesians uses the word “one” seven times in just two verses in chapter 4. This passage drives home the idea that our decision-making happens not just on an individual level in isolation, but in community with others with whom we are supposed to live in unity. The writer continues to talk more about what this unity looks like, and presents a few core aspects to help readers understand unity, which hopefully inspires us to make choices that seek to build others up into this unity that comes in the body of Christ. G. Porter Turner notes that:

The tools for this body are humility, gentleness, and patience. Humility keeps us grounded in the reality of who we are as creatures formed from the dust by God. Gentleness reminds us of our corporate identity . . . Finally, we are patient because we live in time. [with an awareness that] the kingdom of God is a gift from God, not a work achieved by humans[v].

These tools, among the others that are revealed throughout the letter to the Ephesians, all point to a unity that binds God’s people together in love through Jesus Christ. This is the high calling of those who follow Christ, and the decisions that we make should always be oriented around this purpose. It is not some accidental phenomenon; it requires ongoing, active work to make it happen. Remember those choices? They’re going to come each and every day. Ephesians serves as that homeroom reminder of the importance of attending to them, not just cruising through life without thought. People of faith are called to live with the intention of building each other up in love and charged with the extraordinarily difficult task of being knit together as one.

The good news is, we have been prepared for this task, because of the one who unites us – Jesus Christ:

“Christ’s body” is that place at the intersection of divine and human life where sovereignty, brokenness, and communion are held together in God’s grace[vi].

That is the unity we celebrate with the sacrament of the Lord’s Supper, gathering around this table not as individuals, but as the body of Christ, made one through the bread and the cup. Here, at this table, we come to proclaim that we are one, and declare our intention to follow Christ, making decisions that might contribute to that unity, until he comes again. So may we celebrate this feast together in unity, asking God to fill us once again and equip us for the lives to which we have been called, going from here to live and serve in Christ’s name, with choices that match. Amen.

~Rev. Elizabeth Lovell Milford
August 5, 2018

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[i] Questions taken from https://conversationstartersworld.com/would-you-rather-questions/, accessed 8/4/2018.
[ii] Walter Brueggemann, Charles B. Cousar, Beverly R. Gaventa, James D. Newsome, Texts for Preaching: A Lectionary Commentary Based on the NRSV – Year B, (Louisville, KY: Westminster/John Knox Press, 1993).
[iii] Ibid.
[iv] Ibid.
[v] G. Porter Taylor, “Theological Perspective: Ephesians 4:1-16,” Feasting on the Word, Year B, Volume 3, David L. Bartlett and Barbara Brown Taylor, editors, (Louisville, KY: Westminster John Knox Press, 2009).
[vi] Richard E. Ward, “Homiletical Perspective: Ephesians 4:1-16,” Feasting on the Word, Year B, Volume 3, David L. Bartlett and Barbara Brown Taylor, editors, (Louisville, KY: Westminster John Knox Press, 2009).

Sunday’s Sermon – Put Your Best Foot Forward – Ephesians 6:10-20

Sunday’s Sermon – Homeroom Lessons: Use Time Wisely – Ephesians 5:15-20

Sunday’s Sermon – Homeroom Lessons: Watch Your Words – Ephesians 4:25-5:2

Sunday’s Sermon – Homeroom Lessons: Make Good Choices – Ephesians 4:1-16

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